So recently I realized just what it means to be a "grown-up".. sure I'm in my early 20's and thought of course, I knew everything.. who doesn't?! But it seems to me that I am quite inexperienced as far as "life" goes which scares the heck out of me!
I have never been one to use the internet to buy anything, ever. But now, I realize that maybe I should have! Because now, I have to be a grown-up and do grown-up things... like buying a breast pump for instance. Well, the best way it seems is to go online but I haven't a freaking CLUE what to do, who to trust and that is not good when you're dropping a few hundred dollars on something via the internet. If I have no experience with this, what else is going to fall into my lap that I'll have to deal with? Ahhh I'm such an organizer and preparer.. (I'm not even sure that's a word) that the next part of this pregnancy, the whole not being pregnant and actually caring for the baby part, scares me to death!! I'm anxious but at the same time, with her in there I don't have much responsibility (besides you know, not dying and things like that).
So right now, I'm on the verge of really being an adult and having someone else's life literally in the palm of my hands. They say all this stuff is normal and right now it's hard to imagine feeling absolutely ready and secure. I'm hoping that I'll see her and all that fear will go away haha but I have a sneaking suspicion it may just get worse. So.. for now, I'm the scared prego mama with a baby really "on the way"... and I'll keep you posted as to how that all pans out!
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